Omens

Not the evil kind. The kinda funny-when-you-think-about-it omens. I saw one of my least favorites this morning, so I decided to break down some of my list of omens:

1. Seeing a news chopper hovering right over your route to work. It inevitably means that if I left even a minute late I will be late to work. Luckily I left a couple of minutes early today, and I made it into work with a smile on my face.

2. Getting home to a dark house when you know you left a light on. Hopefully it's just a burned out light bulb. Likely the electricity is out. On Sunday, our house was the in the middle of a 7-block radius outage. We went to the movies for an unplanned date night. It was awesome.

3. Noticing that your vehicle is leaning to one side. Maybe you parked on a weird hill. Maybe the tire is low. Maybe it is completely flat. I made it 5 minutes from the office when my truck was at about a 30 degree angle left compared to the car in front of me. I pulled over, didn't panic, called my husband, called the tire store to let them know we'd be coming, then started lifting the truck with the jack so it would be ready for JR. It took several hours (since JR was a good two hours away in rush hour traffic, but he came because he loves me), but we got 4 new tires for the truck and had an impromptu dinner out at a local deli. Good times.

4. Hearing running water in an empty bathroom. Sure, somebody could have accidentally left the sink on. In my case, while someone took a shower upstairs the toilet downstairs was overflowing so much that it was pouring into the floor. Sigh. The plumbing problems we've experienced over the last 3 months have been AWESOME (sarcasm intended). We did finally get it taken care of (tree roots removed!), and we learned that being home owners is fun, exciting, scary, and expensive. We were able to laugh it off together, though.

There are many, many more "omens" like these...what are some of yours?

The Exes

So, I have a few exes...yes, we’ll say “few.” They’ve each meant something different to me, and they are important parts of my PAST. Those relationships helped me become the loving, honest, open, and caring wife I am today. Here’s a recap:

The very first high school boyfriend
The obsessive, abusive high school boyfriend
The wishy-washy college-aged boyfriend
The very first college boyfriend
The passionate love of my 20s
The fiancé

Being in Sync

My husband and I are in sync. We can be thinking the exact thought at the same time. It’s weird sometimes. For example, on our way up to his family reunion on Friday, I was playing iPod DJ (which is a big honor). I picked out a few songs, and he asked, “You know what would be an awesome next song?” I replied, “Well, I have one picked out, but what would you like to hear?” He gave me the song title, and I gasped as I showed him the highlighted song on the screen...the exact song he wanted to hear. WOW.

Now, some of you might just mark this as coincidence. Some might say it was the next logical song choice, so of course you both picked it. Instead, I say it is because we are perfect for each other. He is absolutely my other half. I do not want to think about a life without him. He is my soul mate. He is my best friend. He is the person who knows me like no other can. He is my rock (and my roll, and my punk, pop, country, soul, blues, etc.). We finish each other's sentences. We say exactly the same thing at the same time. We freak each other out when we have the same idea about something. We laugh at each other when it happens.

I know it seems disgusting. I even find it nauseating at times. We are so shmoopy. We cannot help it. I am madly in love with that man!


During our weekend, I ventured off with JR's older sister and a cousin. We had a fabulous time sharing some drinks and participating in karaoke. Well, I sang while they watched and laughed. That was on night two of the trip, and JR's cousin said to me, "You know, I have learned a couple of things this weekend. You like to have a good time, and you absolutely love JR." I just smiled, nodded, and replied, "Yes. Yes I do. With my whole heart." I meant it for both things. I love to have a good time with my whole heart, and I love my husband with my whole heart. They go hand-in-hand...in sync.

A Poem

May
Your

Days
Always
Dawn

Happily
And
Serenely.

Cherish
All
New
Challenges,
Ever
Ready.

-------------------

I wrote that poem on August 26, 2009. The day after I found out my dad had prostate cancer. The first letter of every word, reading down, was my inspiration for the poem.

My dad has always been a very healthy man. He worked a full-time,manual-labor job for 35 years. He worked on his farm and yard in his "spare" time. He drank a lot of water and no booze. He like ice cream and candy and salty foods, and those were his only weaknesses as far as I remember.

He started going to the doctor in his late 40's/early 50's for regular "I'm not getting any younger" visits. He had a physical, and he did learn he needed to cut down on salt...his sugars, however, were fine. Go figure. The man eats ice cream and candy like it's going out of style, and his sugars are normal. I wish I could say that. His blood pressure was a bit out of whack, but he is treating it medication and seems to be controlled. He goes in for his regular visits, and his visit last fall showed something a little not normal.

It's the little things...

Last night I went to a Cubs game with my husband and about 15 other people on a bus from the YMCA...it was a good time, even though the Cubbies broke my husband's heart for the umpteenth time. On the drive back, he sat in the seat behind me. While I was taking a little snooze in my seat, leaned over resting my head on my arm, my husband rubbed the kinks out of my shoulders. For almost the entire ride. I felt so very loved to fall asleep on a bouncy bus while my dearest put away his own tired feelings for me. When we finally made it home and were in bed for the night I returned the favor by gently rubbing his back until he feel asleep. I felt just as loved doing that for him as I did when we was doing it for me.

The little things are the things that keep me going. The private joke. The funny face. The silly note. The touch of a hand on my shoulder. The kiss on the forehead. The cupcakes on a Saturday morning after a bad week. His knowing I am going to start crying as soon as we cross the Tennessee/Kentucky border on our way from from visiting my family, and knowing I won't stop crying until we hit Paducah. Coming up with a new way to tell me goodbye everyone morning (today was "Have a Terrific Tuesday! I love you!). Laughing so hard we cry. Dancing in the aisles of the grocery store. Singing at the top of our lungs in the shower, and the car, and the kitchen, and everywhere. Quoting movies as an entire conversation.

So many little things that we do for each other and together...I love them all.

The little things make my marriage wonderful and fresh everyday. Take time for those little things.

Getting Involved - Giving Back

JR and I went to our local library on Saturday to get new library cards. It has been years since either of us actually had a library card. It was something we decided to do as members of our new community. Later that day, we went to the village jubilee - food vendors, live music, bingo, carnival rides, and fireworks. We really enjoyed it, and we even chatted with some of the Jaycees we knew when we were involved with them before. We are considering joining the chapter in our new community. I am already looking forward to other opportunities at the library and in the village for us to give back.

JR and I met through the Jaycees, volunteering, running projects, attending social events, etc. I've volunteered at the YMCA where he works. We've volunteered together for other organizations in the area. I always attend the Kiwanis Pancake Breakfast (and not only because my husband mixes up a mean pancake batter!). We seek out other community organizations nearby who are hosting pancake breakfasts (I LOVE pancakes).

As my relationship with my husband developed, I looked up to him for the unselfish ways he gave back. I admired his ability to silently do things that needed to be done. He made me want to be a better person, and he still does. When we moved into our home, we decided we would get involved in our new community. We were both raised to give back what we could, and we want to keep that tradition going.

We can't always give monetarily, but do we have to? I think the time and sweat and effort we put into making something better for others is just as important. I can very easily give up my Saturday to help some kids celebrate Christmas who would not otherwise be able to. I can just as easily call out bingo numbers at a retirement home (even though JR is much better at the calling). I can lift a moderate amount of weight, so bring on the heavy boxes full of food for families in need. Getting involved and giving back is silently rewarding. That warm-fuzzy feeling is all I need to get through the day.

Sisters

Today's storm has led my brain into one of those train-of-consciousness-type nostalgia sessions...

It begins with my trip to the Wilton Tent Sale with my baby sister Deanna last weekend...we had breakfast with our husbands, her daughter, and our brother's daughter at McDonald's. She and I walked over to the tent sale while the boys took the girls to the park. We had such a great time walking up and down the aisles and picking out things we loved or needed or really, really wanted...It was great to spend time with my sister in that way: as adults, as friends, with such a relaxed agenda.

As we approached checkout, the bottom fell out of the sky. It was pouring, and we had left the car at McDonald's--all the way across the big Wilton parking lot...so, we wrapped up our purchases in the big plastic garbage bags they gave us, and we started out. We didn't run. We didn't scream. We laughed. We laughed HARD. We stomped in a couple of puddles. We smiled so big it hurt our faces. We had a great time walking in the rain, arm in arm, as sisters and friends. We felt like kids again. We both said aloud how lucky we felt to be spending this time together since we are so far apart geographically.

A turn in my memory lane led me to hunkering down in the middle hallway of my parents' home during a heavy storm with my middle sister Teresa when we were teenagers. We were at home alone, and when the storm started we completely freaked out. We thought for sure a tornado was going to come rip the house off the foundation and send us flying. We were holding hands, and we had written a "if you find us" note (I have never claimed to NOT be dramatic...). We can laugh about it now, but it was one of the few times --ever-- that I've spent that kind of quality time with Teresa.

Deanna and I were fast friends as children. She is almost six years younger than me, and she clung onto me with all her might as a kid. We hit a rough patch when I left for college, wide-eyed and ready to meet the world head-on. She felt abandoned, and I had no idea...years later, as she was starting her marriage and I was settling into Chicago as my long-term home, we grew closer again. She's my first best friend. I cherish her, and I am so happy that we can still laugh in the rain together.

Teresa and I were constant competitors. She is almost two years younger than me, and she was always held up to a standard by others that I didn't even know I had set...I ached for her to appreciate the things I did as the older sister. I wanted to be friends with her and be able to hang out with her. She wanted little to nothing to do with me. I tried so hard for so very long to develop a relationship with her. I still put forth an effort, but I know I've given up some hope. I love her dearly, but I feel lost when I try to put into words what our relationship is or should be.

I know other sisters who have long-distance friendships, who have strained relationships, who have come back into the lives of each other, who have not spoken in years... I know of sisters in pain because they cannot be together.

Let me tell you something: Nobody is ever going to know you as well as the sister you grew up with. Nobody else is going to know the perfect thing to say to make it all better and to make it all come crashing down. Nobody else will be able to have an entire conversation with you that nobody else can even begin to comprehend, whether it's facial gestures, nonsensical words, or a specific giggle. Nobody else can make you feel like dirt and just as quickly make you feel like the queen of the universe (or co-queen, anyway).



Love your sisters. If you don't have biological sisters, love your sister-friends.